Celebrant First Anniversary
Exactly a year ago today I was setting out to take my first funeral. I actually led two funerals on my first day – as a newbie I didn’t dare turn either down from different funeral directors in case they didn’t ask again (our training was always ‘say yes!’), but thanks to the wisdom and advice of Christine Jolly http://www.lanterncelebrant.co.uk/, I realised it was something I could manage, (though I still wouldn’t like it to be the norm). I felt nervous, desperate to do my best for the families, and excited, that all my training and learning was about to be put into practice.
The families had no idea that this was my first day – in the meetings with them beforehand they had assumed that I was experienced, and I hadn’t given them any reason to suspect I was a novice.
At the end of that day I felt elated, tired but buzzing – to see an ambition that I had held for nearly a decade come to fruition, to know that the next time a funeral director asked me how many funerals I’d led I wouldn’t have to say ‘none’ and hope they were prepared to take a complete gamble on me.
A year later, and today I am leading my 73rd funeral. In that year I have written and conducted funerals in various crematoria, green burial grounds and cemeteries, most often in Shrewsbury, but also in Dumfries, Swansea, Nottingham, Aberystwyth and Wrexham . I always tailor my ceremonies to each individual, finding the right bit of poetry, encouraging and supporting people who wish to speak, and where appropriate making beautiful candle bowls with natural elements specific to the person who has died. I love it when after a service people ask (and they frequently do) ‘Did you know X?’ ‘That was him to a T.’
I have had some wonderful feedback from the families I have worked with, just this week an email arrived “You did such a good job making a coherent summary from our rambling meanderings of memory; respectful, warm, amusing, spirited, honest. Your guidance through the process was really valuable and much appreciated.”
This is one of my most gratifying messages - “At the start of this process I thought the funeral was just something that had to be got out of the way. Instead with your thought and care, it has been a very healing process for me”
These comments are the reason I absolutely love what I do – knowing that I can make a positive difference at such a difficult time in people’s lives.
It’s time for me to say ‘Thank you’ - to https://greenfuse.co.uk/ for the excellent training, the funeral directors who gave me a chance, to my local celebrant friends who are always there to support and advise, but most of all thank you to the families for opening their hearts, sharing their grief and love, working with me to make ceremonies to mourn, celebrate and remember those they loved.